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Flourish Group Schedule

Sun, 04 Jan 2026 17:22:35 GMT

Let's Plan for Success-- with Financial Therapy GROUP!

One of the things I hear most often from clients and community members is:
“I want to do this… I just wish I knew about it sooner.”

So for 2026, I decided to do something a little different — and a little more supportive.

I’m officially scheduling all 2026 Flourish Group offerings in advance so you can see what’s coming, notice what aligns with your season of life, and make decisions that don’t feel rushed or reactive. This work is about steadiness, capacity, and choice — and the way we schedule it should reflect that too.

Flourish groups are intentionally small, relational, and paced. Knowing the dates ahead of time allows you to check in with your energy, your calendar, and your nervous system and say, “Yes, this is doable,” instead of “I’ll figure it out later.”

2026 Flourish Group Schedule

Here are the group times currently available for 2026:

Tuesday mornings , starting January 13th at 9:00 a.m. MT
Wednesday evenings , starting February 11th at 6:00 p.m. MT
(may skip March 4th)
Wednesday evenings , starting April 1st at 6:00 p.m. MT
Tuesday mornings , starting April 21st at 9:00 a.m. MT
Wednesday evenings , starting September 9th at 6:00 p.m. MT
Wednesday mornings , starting November 4th at 9:00 a.m. MT
Tuesday evenings , starting November 10th at 6:00 p.m. MT

If none of these times fit your current reality, that’s okay too. Interest matters — even when timing doesn’t. Letting me know helps shape future offerings in a way that’s responsive to real lives, not ideal schedules. Fill in the group interest form and provide me with suggestions that would work for you!

A Different Way of Planning

This isn’t about filling every hour of your calendar. It’s about creating enough visibility that you can choose support before things feel overwhelming. Flourish is designed to meet you where you are — financially, emotionally, and practically — and that starts with transparent, thoughtful scheduling. This way if a group doesn’t have at least 4 participants 1-2 weeks prior to the group, I will have the opportunity to contact those that have already signed up to make other arrangements. Without deep disappointment, we can rearrange with more intention as well.

If one of these groups feels like a gentle “yes,” I’d love to have you. And if now isn’t the moment, you’re still very welcome here.

Flourishing doesn’t happen all at once — it happens when we plan with intention. Let's schedule a No-Cost Consultation to see if group will be a good fit for you!

How to Financially Prep for a New Year That Aligns With Your Values

Fri, 02 Jan 2026 06:47:58 GMT

Cheers to 2026 being aligned with our values!

As the year winds down, I have a yearly business ritual I return to every single December.

I sit at my table or my desk with a stack of holiday cards and I slowly, intentionally write notes to the people who helped carry me through the year—the ones who sent referrals, spoke my name in rooms I wasn’t in, offered encouragement when things felt shaky, or simply believed in me when I was building something that mattered deeply to my heart (even if I didn’t know how much it mattered.)

It’s one of my favorite parts of the year. This year it was something that kept getting moved to the bottom of the TO-DO list and when I finally did it after the kids went to bed (a few days after Christmas) I was so sad I waited so long because the words flowed so naturally. Seeing the stack of Christmas cards warmed my heart in the way it does every year.

Not because it’s productive in the traditional sense.
Not because it checks something off a list.
But because it grounds me in why I do what I do.

Reflection Before Resolution

Writing those cards does something powerful. It forces me to pause and look honestly at where I am—and how I got here.

I’m reminded that I am not self-made.
That my work, my practice, my growth didn’t happen in isolation.
That there are real people behind every opportunity, every client, every step forward.

This year, I had the pleasure of writing cards to those that helped me grow my financial therapy practice. The enthusiasm that I have for this work was EVIDENT . Reminding me that there have been few times in my life where I truly have felt like I am doing what I was put on this Earth to do.... but being a financial therapist truly feels like that.

So.

I didn’t just write the cards—I sat with each name. I let myself really feel the support that showed up for me in 2025. I reflected on the conversations, the trust, the referrals, the moments where someone saw my passion and said, “Yes, I believe in this.”... "Yes, I believe in her."

And in doing that, something clicked.

This was the year I became the sturdy financial therapist I feel like today.

Not because I worked harder.
Not because I hustled more.
But because I leaned fully into what I value most.

Why This Matters (Financially, Too)

Connection and reciprocity are not just nice ideas to me—they are core values.

And when I honor them, everything shifts.

When I lead with gratitude, my nervous system settles.
When I acknowledge support, I feel resourced instead of alone.
When I practice reciprocity, abundance stops feeling theoretical and starts feeling lived.

What I received this year—professionally, financially, emotionally—came ten-fold when I stayed rooted in those values.

And this is where money comes in.

Values Are the Foundation of Financial Alignment

We often talk about preparing financially for a new year in terms of numbers:

Budgets
Goals
Savings
Plans

But real financial alignment doesn’t start with spreadsheets.
It starts with values.

When your financial decisions reflect what you deeply care about, money becomes less about restriction and more about expression.

For me, honoring connection looks like:

Investing time in relationships
Expressing gratitude openly
Building a practice rooted in trust and care

Financially, that means I’m willing to allocate money and energy toward things that strengthen those values—because they are the very things that sustain my work and my life.

The same is true for you.

Preparing for a Values-Aligned New Year

As you look ahead to the new year, I invite you to pause before you plan.

Ask yourself:

Who helped me become who I am this year?
What values showed up again and again in my life?
Where did I feel most grounded, most fulfilled, most like myself?
How did money support—or disconnect me from—those moments?

When you answer those questions honestly, your financial priorities often become much clearer.

Maybe it’s investing more in community.
Maybe it’s creating more margin in your life.
Maybe it’s setting boundaries around spending that no longer aligns.

There’s no one right answer— only your answer .

Money as a Relationship

Money, like relationships, responds to intention.

When we lead with fear or disconnection, it often mirrors that back to us.
When we lead with clarity, gratitude, and values, it tends to soften.

This year taught me that when I honor connection and reciprocity—when I truly live those values—money flows in ways that feel supportive instead of stressful.

That’s the kind of financial preparation I’m carrying into the new year.

Not perfection.
Not control.
But alignment.

And if you’re willing to start there too, you may be surprised by what unfolds.

Money, like relationships, responds to intention.

Intentionality in Financial Therapy

If you would like to begin the new year off with intention and emotional clarity when it comes to your finances, I would love to have a conversation about how I can help guide that intentionality.

Individual Financial Therapy offers a private space to be able to talk about your specific money story and begin to rewrite that story to be one that aligns with the 2026 version of you!
Group Financial Therapy offers immediate de-shaming of the where you have gotten to where you are at with your relationship with money. Every group ends up with a very unique blend of personalities, but each group is a safe, kind, supportive place to talk about what is happening with your relationship with money. If you are interested you can fill out the Group Interest Form and let me know when would work for you best!

Happy New Year!

Jury Duty Called: Floush Group is Pushed Back 1 Week!!

Tue, 28 Oct 2025 15:25:46 GMT

Jury duty called this week!

The next round of Flourish: Women’s Financial Wellness Group on Tuesday, November 5th instead of this week.

While civic duty is important (and I am a bit sad I didn't get to take the case to finality), it definitely threw a little curveball into my schedule! Beginning a pretty epic game of scheduling Tetris that I DO NOT love playing.

For those that know me, know that I like structure and planning..... as far in advance as possible. So being flexible and communicating with all clients this week about all of the "maybe's" in my schedule has me not feeling as sturdy as I want to be for a group of women seeking a steady, sturdy relationship with their money. Soooo....

Insert lemons into lemonade vibes here

If you were on the fence about joining, this little shift might be your sign — one extra week to say yes to yourself and to your relationship with money.

Flourish isn’t just another group about budgets and spreadsheets.

It’s a space for women who are ready to:

��Untangle the stress and shame that can show up around money

��Understand the “why” behind their financial habits

��Learn how emotions and finances intertwine — and how to shift the story

��Connect with other women who get it

If that sounds like what you’ve been needing, there’s still time to grab a spot before we begin on November 5th!

Learn more or sign up here: https://form.jotform.com/252796907350163

#financialliteracy #FinancialTherapy #sturdy

How Your Money Story Shapes Your Financial Decisions Today

Wed, 22 Oct 2025 03:40:39 GMT

How Family Lessons and Early Experiences Influence the Way You Handle Money

We all have a money story. It’s the invisible narrative that we carry — built from our earliest experiences, family influences, and the lessons we absorbed (spoken or unspoken) about what money means. Our money story shapes how we spend, save, give, and even how we feel when we look at our bank account.

For me, my money story started on the dusty roads of central Montana...

I come from a long line of entrepreneurs — my grandparents, parents, and even many of my cousins and my brother have all built lives rooted in hard work and self-starting grit. Growing up, I didn’t just see that work ethic; I lived it. I spent my childhood riding along with my dad in his truck as he moved mobile homes across the plains. My first “jobs” were small — moving little wedges of wood to help block and level the homes — but as I got older, I found myself moving the heavier blocks and even driving pilot cars.

Those experiences taught me that goals are achieved through consistent effort. There were no shortcuts or guarantees, just hands-on work, problem-solving, and a lot of determination.

So when I imagined my adult life, I thought I’d follow a different, more “traditional” path: go to college, work my 30 years, retire, and enjoy the security I’d built. That was the version of stability I thought I needed… one that made sense in contrast to the uncertainty that comes with entrepreneurship.

But as I worked my way through my master’s degree in Counselor Education, something began to shift. I found myself drawn toward clinical and school counseling, spaces where I could really see people, listen deeply, and help them navigate the emotional layers of their lives. It was there that I began to understand how much our internal world shapes our external realities — especially around money.

I started noticing a pattern: when clients talked about their stress, their relationships, or their goals, money was almost always part of the story — but it was often the part left unsaid. So many people carry anxiety, shame, or confusion about their finances, yet struggle to talk about it openly. And I realized, that silence wasn’t random. It came from the stories they’d inherited, just like I had inherited mine. It didn’t feel safe to talk about money. It felt scary and unpredictably wrought with uncertainty.

For me, my story is one of earning — of equating hard work with worth, productivity with safety. It’s given me resilience and motivation, but it’s also shown me the importance of rest, reflection, and redefining success. For years I had to unlearn what the true definition of worth was and become a more sturdy version of myself to not constantly feel "not-enoughness." For others, their stories might be about scarcity, fear of losing what they’ve earned, or guilt about having more than those around them.

The thing about money stories is that they’re powerful, but they’re not permanent.

When we start to recognize where our beliefs come from, we begin to see that we have choices. We can honor the values our families gave us — like work ethic and independence — while also writing new chapters that include balance, compassion, and emotional freedom.

That’s the work I love most: helping people understand not just the numbers in their financial life, but the narratives that drive them. Because when we bring awareness to our money story, we can move from reacting out of fear or habit to making decisions rooted in clarity, intention, and self-trust.

Your money story got you here. But you get to decide where it goes next.

Begin Writing Your Money Story

One of the most powerful steps you can take toward financial clarity is to explore your own money story. Here’s a simple outline to help you begin:

Family Lessons Around Money

What did you observe about money as a child?
How did your parents, grandparents, or siblings handle money?
What messages did you hear (spoken or unspoken) about spending, saving, or wealth?

Early Experiences

Think of specific memories involving money.
Were there moments of abundance, scarcity, or struggle?
How did these moments make you feel at the time?

Personal Beliefs About Money

What do you believe about money now?
Do you associate money with security, stress, freedom, or something else?
Are these beliefs serving you or holding you back?

Money Behaviors

How do your beliefs show up in your spending, saving, or financial decision-making?
Are there patterns that repeat, even when they don’t serve your goals?

Your Aspirations

What kind of relationship with money would you like to have?
How might your story evolve if you allowed yourself new possibilities?

Tip: Write freely without judgment. This is your story — there’s no “right” or “wrong,” only insight. Over time, reflecting on your story can help you make decisions that feel aligned with your goals, values, and the life you truly want to create.

Is Financial Anxiety Keeping You Stuck?

Tue, 23 Sep 2025 17:02:22 GMT

Picture this: you’re teaching someone how to make a ham sandwich.

It’s simple, right?
Grab some bread. Add the ham. Maybe cheese. Maybe mustard. Done.

There’s no emotional baggage in sandwich-making. No shame about how your parents used to make sandwiches. No panic over whether you bought the “right” bread. No spiraling thoughts about whether people will judge you for preferring mustard over mayo.

It’s just a sandwich.

Now imagine if money felt that simple.

For so many people, it doesn’t. Instead of reaching for the bread, financial decisions get tangled up with anxiety, fear, shame, or even paralysis. What could be as straightforward as “add cheese, if you like” becomes a swirl of self-doubt:

What if I’m making the wrong choice?
What if people think I’m irresponsible?
What if I "go broke" and I won't make it out?
What if I never figure this out?

That’s the heart of financial anxiety —and it can keep you stuck.

What Is Financial Anxiety?

Financial anxiety isn’t just “worrying about money.” It’s the constant undercurrent of stress, avoidance, or dread that shows up when you’re faced with financial decisions. It’s not always about how much or how little you have—it’s about how you feel when you interact with money.

Some common signs of financial anxiety include:

Avoiding looking at your bank account
Delaying important decisions, like paying bills or investing
Feeling a tightness in your chest when money comes up in conversation
Judging yourself harshly for past financial mistakes
Believing you’re “bad” with money, even when you’re doing your best

It’s like having a voice in your head that turns even the simplest money decisions into high-stakes dilemmas. That voice keeps you from moving forward, from building confidence, and from experiencing freedom with money.

Why We Get Stuck

Money is rarely just about dollars and cents. It’s about identity, security, and belonging. From a young age, we absorb messages about money— what it means, how it’s used, whether it’s safe to talk about, and what it says about our worth.

Maybe you grew up hearing, “We can’t afford that.” Or perhaps you were told, “Money doesn’t grow on trees.” Maybe you saw conflict about money in your family or learned that silence was the safest approach.

Over time, these messages become stories we carry into adulthood. They whisper in the background every time we swipe a debit card, sit down to make a budget, or think about asking for a raise.

No wonder financial decisions can feel so heavy.

The Ham Sandwich Test

Here’s a little thought experiment:

What if financial decisions carried the same emotional weight as sandwich-making?

Imagine if you could walk into a store or open the Amazon app, decide on what you need, and move on without the flood of second-guessing. Imagine if you could look at your bank account the way you look at your fridge—just checking what’s inside, not attaching meaning to whether it’s “good” or “bad.”

When we strip away the shame and fear, money decisions can become clearer and less overwhelming. Just like a sandwich, you can choose what you like, make adjustments as you go, and know there’s no one “perfect” way to do it.

How Financial Anxiety Keeps You From Moving Forward

The real challenge is that financial anxiety doesn’t just feel uncomfortable—it can keep you from making progress.

Avoidance leads to missed opportunities. Ignoring your statements or delaying decisions can mean late fees, lost savings, or stalled growth.
Shame fuels procrastination. When you’re stuck in a cycle of self-criticism, it’s harder to take the small steps that build confidence.
Fear limits your options. Worrying about making the “wrong” choice can keep you from making any choice at all.

And just like hunger doesn’t go away because you’re too anxious to make a sandwich, financial needs don’t disappear because you avoid them. The longer you wait, the bigger the hunger—or in this case, the stress—grows.

Building Safety and Confidence

So, how do you start untangling financial anxiety and building a sense of calm around money ?

Here are a few steps:

Create a Safe Environment
Just as you feel more at ease making a sandwich in your own kitchen, you’ll feel more confident with money when you create a sense of safety. That might mean working with a trusted financial professional, setting boundaries around unhelpful money conversations, or starting in small, private steps.
Practice Self-Compassion
Remind yourself that money anxiety is common. You’re not “bad” with money—you’re human. Talking to yourself with kindness instead of criticism softens the emotional weight.
Start Small
Instead of overhauling everything at once, focus on small, doable actions: calming your body before hitting the “Buy Now” button, checking your balance, notice any emotional dysregulation before making choices, setting up one automatic payment, or making a list of expenses. Each step builds confidence, just like adding one sandwich ingredient at a time.
Challenge Old Stories
Notice the beliefs you’ve carried from the past. Notice if they are beginning to drive your money decisions today. Ask yourself, Is this story still serving me? You have the power to rewrite your money narrative.
Seek Support
Financial therapy can provide the warmth, safety, and tools needed to explore your relationship with money and build confidence in your decisions. Sometimes having someone sit beside you makes the “sandwich-making” a whole lot easier.

Reframing Money Conversations

The goal isn’t to make money feel insignificant —financial conversations are important . But we can make it feel more approachable. Imagine what would shift if talking about budgeting felt like talking about your lunch plans. Imagine if saving for the future carried as much emotional weight as deciding whether you want Cheddar or Swiss.

When money conversations become lighter, we can approach them with curiosity, flexibility, and even creativity. We can stop avoiding, start deciding, and move forward with confidence.

Final Thoughts

Financial anxiety can make even the smallest decisions feel impossible, keeping you stuck in cycles of avoidance and shame. But just like making a sandwich, money doesn’t have to be complicated or emotionally overwhelming.

When you create a sense of safety, practice compassion, and take small, intentional steps, you can move from anxiety to confidence. You can rewrite your money story.

And maybe one day, you’ll find yourself smiling as you think: If I can make a ham sandwich, I can make this financial decision, too

Why Is Money Emotional?

Thu, 07 Aug 2025 00:13:59 GMT

How Sally’s Story Might Help You Understand Your Own.

Sally is a 35-year-old mom of two. She works full-time, packs lunches, signs permission slips, and tries her best every single day to raise good humans. She also tries really hard to make sure her children have everything they need—and if she’s being honest, sometimes more than they need.

She’s not flashy. She’s not careless. In fact, most people in her life would say she’s incredibly thoughtful and generous. But every once in a while, Sally opens her credit card bill and feels a wave of shame roll in.

There it is. Target. Amazon. Target again. Another Amazon order. A few last-minute school purchases. A cart full of clothes because there was a sale. Birthday party favors. A backpack that matched their friends’. New shoes because the old ones were “ugly.”

And all of it? For the kids.

She scrolls through the charges and starts doing that thing—telling herself she should have known better, she should have waited, she should have said no.

But in the moment? Saying no didn’t feel like an option. She didn’t want her children to feel left out. She didn’t want them to feel how she used to feel.

You see, when Sally was growing up, money was tight. Her parents moved the family around constantly—new towns, new schools, new apartments. It always felt like they were starting over. And every time she showed up in a new place, kids would look her up and down, sizing her up by what she wore. Sally learned early on that showing up in the “right” clothes gave her a fighting chance. On the days she wore something new or fashionable, she felt like she belonged. But the days she had to wear something from Goodwill? She felt a quiet, aching shame—one she didn’t have words for then but still feels in her body now.

Even today, she can’t bring herself to walk into a secondhand store. Just the idea of it makes her stomach churn. And when her kids ask for something—whether it’s a cool sweatshirt or a new set of colored pencils—she finds herself saying yes almost automatically.

Because for Sally, spending on her kids isn’t just spending. It’s protecting. It’s proving. It’s rewriting a story she didn’t like living through herself.

And yet... those purchases still pile up. And sometimes, the tension in her relationship does too.

Sally’s partner doesn’t always understand why the Amazon boxes keep showing up. They’ve had more than a few arguments about money. It’s not that they’re on the brink of financial crisis, but the disconnect is real. He sees “extra stuff” piling up. She sees armor. He wants her to say “no” more often. She doesn’t know how to say no without feeling like she’s letting her kids down—or letting her past catch back up with her.

So she hides the bags. Deletes the order confirmation emails. Tries to justify the purchases out loud, but the defensiveness creeps in. The guilt. The confusion. The emotional overload.

And then that shame again.

This is why money is emotional.

It’s rarely just about budgeting or willpower. It’s about experiences we had before we even had a bank account. It’s about what we were told money meant—and what we felt it meant when we had it, or didn’t. It’s about identity, security, and love.

Sally doesn’t overspend because she’s irresponsible. She overspends because she remembers. She remembers what it felt like to be judged, to be left out, to feel like everyone could see right through her family’s struggles. And she’s doing everything in her power to make sure her kids don’t feel that way—even if it costs her peace of mind.

Do you see any part of yourself in Sally’s story?
Do you ever find yourself looking at your spending and wondering, "Why did I do that?"
Do you ever feel guilty for saying yes too often, or ashamed when you try to say no?
Do money conversations with your partner bring up more emotion than you expect?

If so, you are not alone.

You are not “bad with money.” You’re human. And you’re carrying a whole lifetime of stories, beliefs, and emotional patterns around money—just like Sally.

That’s exactly why I created Flourish: A Women’s Financial Wellness Group.

Flourish is a 6-week guided group experience that goes beyond budgets and spreadsheets. It’s a place to explore your money story with honesty and compassion, surrounded by other women who are ready to do the same. We unpack the emotional patterns like Sally’s. We explore where they came from. And most importantly—we work on rewriting those patterns in ways that honor your past and support your future.

You don’t need to do this alone.

�� The next round of Flourish is starting soon. Six weeks. One hour a week. Real tools, real stories, and real change. Let’s grow together. ��

If you’re curious if Flourish is a good fit for you, reach out. I’d love to help you find out.

What 56Strong Gave Me — and Why Being Named Mentee of the Year Means So Much

Wed, 25 Jun 2025 20:04:24 GMT

When I applied to be part of the 56Strong Women’s Mentorship Program, I knew I was signing up for something that had the potential to support me — but I didn’t know just how transformative it would be for me personally and for my financial therapy practice.

56Strong is a statewide initiative that matches women from each of Montana’s 56 counties into meaningful one-on-one mentoring relationships. The goal? To cultivate leadership, connection, and confidence among women across our state. In a place as vast and rural as Montana, creating strong ties across geography, experience, and industries is no small feat — and yet 56Strong does it with heart, intention, and an unshakable belief in the power of women supporting women.

As a mentee, I was paired with a mentor (BIG shout out to Amy Falcione @ Big Picture Marketing !!) whose insight, generosity, and wisdom became a grounding presence during a year full of growth and Big Life Stuff. Running two therapy practices, expanding my financial therapy group offerings, supporting clients through their own vulnerable transitions, while raising a family — it was a lot. But every time I connected with my Amy, I was reminded that I wasn’t alone. That I could be both driven and tired, both ambitious and human. When 56Strong was in the planning and matching portion of the process, I told them that the one thing that I wanted in a mentor was a regulated nervous system.

So when I learned that I had been selected as the 2025 56Strong Mentee of the Year, I was deeply honored — and more than a little surprised. To be recognized among so many passionate, resilient, brilliant women across the state is humbling beyond words.

What made it even more meaningful was the nomination my mentor, Amy, submitted. She wrote:

“I would like to nominate my mentee Stacy for special recognition because of her grit and commitment to building her financial therapy business and supporting her clients while also caring for her family, running an entirely separate therapy practice, and managing some Big Life Stuff. What struck me in each of our conversations is how Stacy's expertise and human-to-human approach shines bright for her financial therapy clients. She really, truly, deeply cares about each person she works with. It's evident in conversations with her, reading through her fantastic website, and in her emails. And the material she shares inside the group? Un.be.lievable! It's thoughtful, logical, comprehensive, and approachable — all things I personally aspire to as a teacher. The testimonials for her group reflect the profound financial confidence Stacy empowers in each person, which is inspiring for anyone trying to do good in the world.”

To read those words — to be seen like that — reminded me why I do this work in the first place. Financial therapy isn’t just about spreadsheets and budgets. It’s about stories, emotions, trust, and healing. It’s about creating spaces where people can talk about money without shame and make decisions from a place of clarity instead of fear. To know that my mentor, someone I respect immensely, saw that in me and believed it deserved recognition — I can’t think of a greater gift.

I want to thank the 56Strong organizers (Woo Lindsey Benov!) for creating a program that’s truly rooted in connection. For making sure that women from every corner of Montana feel included, heard, and supported. I’m walking away from this experience with more clarity, deeper confidence, and a sense of responsibility to keep showing up — not just for my own goals, but for the women coming up alongside and behind me.

To my fellow mentees and mentors: thank you for sharing your stories, cheering each other on, and reminding me that leadership looks like many things. Sometimes, it looks like grit. Sometimes, it looks like grace. Most of the time, it’s both.

This award isn’t just a reflection of my year — it’s a celebration of the kind of community we’re building here in Montana. And I’m so, so grateful to be part of it.

Post-Conference Clarity: Lessons That Endure from the 2025 Financial Therapy Association Conference

Tue, 24 Jun 2025 00:18:14 GMT

As I write this it has been 10 days, 12 hours, and 30 minutes since I returned home from the 2025 Financial Therapy Association Annual Conference (FTAC25) in Athens, Georgia—a powerful gathering of minds from the financial and mental health worlds.

I’ve wanted to attend for years after hearing mentors describe how special it is. They often mentioned how inclusive and warm the community felt, and based on the financial therapists I’ve met along the way, I believed them. I had met many members of the FTA and had proof.

What I didn’t expect was the depth of that warmth—an overwhelming kindness and love from people I’d only just met.

I am no longer buzzing. The information (as much as I could) has been integrated into my mind in a way that feels calm and usable. I do, however, still get very emotional if others ask me how the conference went and what I learned while I was there.

Assumptions that I held prior to showing up in Athens, that were proven from the very first breakfast in the hotel:

People will be kind, open and willing to talk to me.
I can lead with myself and trust that others will hold space for me.
I will not be judged as a “small town, know nothing” person.

What I didn’t know:

I will be acknowledged, seen, and celebrated.
I would share myself with others, and they would ask me to know more.
Being from Montana was celebrated and allowed for so many great conversations about culture and weather
I would not be anxious and uncertain getting to know new people because the culture breathes inclusivity no matter what race, culture, religion or other affiliation that would typically divide the emotion, laughter, and tears in the room. The calm excitement for possibility and inclusivity in my world is still being felt.
What I was going to emotionally experience this week was the EXACT thing that I need to be able to provide my financial therapy clients—Calm excitement to talk about a topic that has so much baggage, but also so much hope. A loving welcoming to the table.
I would cry all the tears leaving everyone that I had just met for the first time or the first time in person. (Don’t get me wrong, I knew I was a crier, but it was so much more than the tears of an exhausted woman with a tired brain ��)

Highlights

“90s Throwback” Reception

I thought about what I was going to wear for this event for WAY TOO LONG! And I LOVED every minute of it!!!

I have been in the “dance like nobody’s watching” belief for many years. I LOVE to dance and move my body and scream the lyrics at the top of my lungs! I want to be able to dance with others as well. I learned in high school at one of my first jobs working maintenance at the Montana State Fairgrounds how to jitterbug between scrubbing the beer from the chairs and cleaning the bathrooms from the previous night’s concert. I never really had a solid dancing partner, so I would have to be the one to lead. To this day I don’t have a solid dance partner, so when the opportunity arises, I don’t have a problem asking someone to dance. Thank-You to Hope for being my inaugural FTAC jitterbug partner. Being able to meet up with a few of the people we had met in the breakout sessions that afternoon in a fun interactive way was a great way to break the ice for even better connections throughout the week! Thank- You Khara for being my date and being willing to stay for “just one more song.” Great work, conference committee, for throwing a great party!

The Neuroscience of Financial Behavior: Connecting Hidden Patterns for More Effective Therapy

Oliver Schnusenberg

I had read the few newsletters that Oliver had put out after we had connected on LinkedIn. I was absolutely intrigued. A neuroscientist in financial therapy? It makes SO MUCH sense. I started my career as a teacher and have always been intrigued with how we end up the way that we do and discerning the nature vs. nurture debate in relation to our behavior and the impacts of trauma. I read many books by Daniel Siegel starting with Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive . From that moment on, the way that I looked at how children behave made so much sense, and subsequently it made me deep dive into why I react/behaved/got anxious about different situations in a way I didn’t like even though I had “worked on it” and REALLY didn’t want to react in the same way in the future. It kept happening. As I transitioned from education to counseling I brought the window of tolerance education with me and have used it with clients of all ages. Now that I work only with adults, I have found that the way in which even adults are completely disembodied is a huge issue in their ability to make permanent changes. In this session with Oliver I was able to gain connections to the actual “hard parts” we are made of as humans and what those parts in our brains are supposed to do when they are working well and when they operating in ways that we don’t want why there is so much shame.

He talked about how Trauma & Procrastination, Perfectionism & Financial Anxiety, and Loss Aversion & Grief work in the brain in similar ways/areas. If we look at this from a financial therapy perspective, we can see how our default network in our brain is going to go to what it knows when the “climate” is feeling similar to ways that it has before. It then reacts in a way to protect us and follow what we have preprogrammed as our belief systems. No wonder why financial behavior is so difficult to change if we have negative beliefs about procrastination, perfection, and discomfort with loss.

Honestly, there are so many parts to his talk that I just want to deep dive and know so much more about including the individual parts of the brain and how so much of our life has created the default networks that we live with. There is hope in centering ourselves and recognizing how these networks are built to begin changing them. I just cant think about our brains and nervous system in the same way again. Thanks Oliver! You have unlocked a space that is going to be so fruitful in me helping my clients remove the shame from how their default mode networks operate so they can “rearrange the furniture” until it is operating closer to how they want it to!

Check out Oliver’s newsletter, Brain on Purpose . This first episode is what got Oliver on my radar and my excitement for what he has to say!

Treatment Planning in a Collaborative Financial Therapy

Nathan Astle and Tyrone White from The Financial Therapy Clinical Institute (FTCI)

Something I have been wanting to do for many months now is network with those that are close to me geographically and I have financial therapy clients working with them already to ensure that we are doing what is best for our clients. It is far too common to have people in different fields sharing contradictory information with clients, leaving money feeling even more elusive. I love the way that Tyrone and Nate were able to share the benefits of the collaboration from a financial coach and financial therapy perspective. I didn’t know Tyrone much before the conference, nor did we get to talk much during the conference, but I had met Nate a few times before—On the first morning before the conference in my “I’ll just go to breakfast in these clothes” clothes I ran into Nate. From the moment that he actually knew who I was, we hugged the best “I’m so happy to see you” hug, I knew that this was going to be a trend of the week. Nate and I had met on multiple occasions online and was excited to meet him in real life. Who in a Zoom call over a year ago told me “I am proud of you.” Which for those that know me, know that all of my tears fell. He was one that was not afraid to ask me where my belief systems came from and opened up a can of worms he was probably not anticipating would be opened. Thank you for giving me even more clarity as to what the whole “Certified Financial Therapist thing” looks like. Collaborative, non-competitive, client-centered with a clear path to whatever financial wellness looks like for the client.

Reflection

I know that for me I get to be regulated and calm when I can trust that my relationships are certain. When I know that I am OK and my relationships are OK, I have the ability excel. When I am uncertain or feel as though there is chaos in my relationships somewhere, I begin to struggle. By beginning the conference with a deep-dive into how my brain in reacting to certain situations that led to a crazy fun time at the 90s party I was able to dance like nobody was watching in a room full of others that were happy to dance along with me. Absorbing some examples of how treatment planning in financial therapy can look allowed me to take my experience with connection to then use that information to validate my processes in how I work with clients as well as how I think about my role as a financial therapist. I had so many different experiences that have me thinking deeper about how I can better my practice, but wanted to highlight a few that are still burned into my brain these many days out.

How It’s Impacted My Work

Confidence

I actually do know things. We could call it self-esteem, imposter syndrome, or a mix of those and more, I find myself struggling to believe that my knowledge, that internally I am so confident is true) is actually…..real. It is almost like disbelief that I would be granted the possibility of having the knowledge and sharing it with the world. After going to the conference and affirming that many of the breakout sessions held information that I already share with clients and am PASSIONATE about sharing, I realize that the knowledge is really REAL! Not only real at this point in the growth of Financial Therapy, but research based.
My brilliant mentor/supervisor/friend, Khara Croswaite Brindle , called me one of her “OG supervisees” stating that it has felt like longer than the almost 2 years since we exchanged the very first email to explore the possibility of me entering an emerging field in Montana where another Financial Therapist doesn’t exist for hundreds of miles across state lines. She has shown me that when a brain gains knowledge and continues to crave more that leaning into that knowledge and writing a book makes that knowledge concrete (and live on.) I have had the pleasure of watching her launch her most recent book Your Enneagram and Money: Transforming Enneagram Edges into Financial Freedom . Her endless smiles and excitement for the topic and the work that has gone into it has lit a fire under me for the past year to read SO many books and want all the knowledge to improve my skills as a financial therapist!

Clarity

As the wise Ed Coambs said in his most recent blog reflection of the conference. “Financial therapy is no longer a fringe idea or a novel curiosity. It is a living, breathing professional discipline with depth, soul, and staying power.” This was FELT. The amount of research and clarity around financial therapy made it evident to me that I am entering this field at a pivotal moment. The field is not only growing, but is a field with a depth of research based practices that are proving to create not only knowledge filled financial therapists, but creating a standard that is allowing each of the professions represented (financially based or mental health based) to have starting place for how to interact with clients through a certified financial therapist lens.

Application

I am revamping the ways in which I gather intake information about my clients. I have been struggling to know what the best practices would be in financial therapy as it is melding two very in deep topics into one comprehensive field, where I as a licensed clinical professional counselor have a focus on how people feel about their relationship with money. Do I ask more about feelings?? How much do I ask about what money looks like in their lives? Do I have enough information about their financial lives to see the impact of their finances? Can I see patterns and trends if I don’t ask for enough information? I am excited to implement many of the tools that Nate is utilizing in his work in making clearer treatment plans in ensuring that I am thinking about money and the human relationship as a bigger picture.
My Flourish group has evolved since the conference. I have shown up in a confident way that has allowed me to spend more time building connection with and between the group members that replicates the inclusive kind environment that I walked into at FTAC. I have learned that the basis of connection is safety. If we can feel safe to ask questions, to be vulnerable, everyone benefits.

Community & Connection

The power of connecting with others in the field has changed me. The way that I am prepared to collaborate with others in my community and the ease that has been spread within my work has allowed me to speak with confidence about financial therapy when I am met with the “what is that?” statement or body language. Now that I have been face to face with those researching the beliefs that many of us have had for years, it has made it so real.

I feel prepared with trustworthy like-minded professionals that I can refer my clients to for further support. I like to empower my clients to “build their team of grown-ups.” By going to this conference, I have been able to truly understand how important it is to engage with other professionals that share common ground.

Some exceptionally notable connections I made and haven’t been mentioned yet:

Amy Irvine —My FTAC25 spirit animal. She is my beautifully intelligent pocket sized spit fire of a woman with so much love and compassion to share in the financial therapy community and her clients, and a deep passion to help others. On the first day of the conference, after I put on my “OK I’m ready to see people for real” clothes on and washed my face I entered the elevator with another woman where we both acknowledged each other with a warm smile and silently rode the elevator to the 3rd floor. Where we were enthusiastically greeted by Dan O’Donnell (who I had met at breakfast earlier) entering the elevator who broke the ice between Amy and I by introducing himself exuberantly to Amy and invited her to go to lunch with us. As we went to lunch with many of those already mentioned I realized that there were extra chairs at the table for those from the conference that wanted to join. By the time we ordered, our table was full and I had gotten to know many things about Amy and her tolerance for cold weather and gluten. She shared with me as we walked out of the restaurant that introverts like her like meeting people like me. I affirmed that extroverts like me love being friends with introverts like her. We made it less than a week before we were making connections to share information. Thank you for your openness and excitement in getting to know me.
Aja Evans —My fellow financial therapist acknowledged that her golden retriever energy saw mine, and was real excited to see it. In that very first lunch I told you about, I wanted to name the excited “golden retriever feelings” I was having and Ed Coambs just said “You are going to meet a lot of Golden Retrievers here…. [*and self-identified as one].” He wasn’t wrong. When I met Aja, outgoing Financial Therapy Association Board President, in person I was able to feel at peace. She said “I like you.” In a simple passing moment in the lobby of the hotel….. You see what she didn’t know about me, is that I find myself doing this frequently with people that I interact with and just enjoy their presence. It is many times met with a “well that was weird response” (in words or body language) so when going to the professional landscape I try to watch my “golden retriever energy” that wants to let everyone know that I see them, like them, and want to hang out with them. Aja didn’t. I loved it!
Supremely Uncool High School Version of Myself —In the closing of the conference I was voted “Most likely to attend FTAC26” Because the theme of the conference was “Financial Therapy U” they had a link to vote for the superlatives of the conference. There is still possibly a voice inside of me that does not believe that out of the 175ish people at the conference that I would be voted for any of the 10 or so superlatives we were voting for. I am still a bit uncertain how there could be enough people in that room who would have even known my name to type in? Maybe only 12 people actually filled in the voting form??? No matter if it was real or not, it had an impact on the intensity of tears at the end of the conference. It was a nod and a wink to my younger self whose sophomore year did not exist in the yearbook at all. In a school of 1200 or so students I was excluded from the entire book including my school picture and the index of student names listed alphabetically in the back. While I know that my disbelief in my nomination being real is only half-hearted because my confidence and clarity in who I am as a person feels solid at this point in my life. Meeting my much younger self at that podium to get my beautifully cheesy trophy was such a delight to welcome her in and allow her to sit beside me in a room of people who saw me, cared about me, and loved me.

Final Financial Therapy Association Conference Reflection

I don’t want this community to shrink in my world. I want to build more connections, stay connected, and welcome conversations about how money and feelings intersect in the most wonderful, chaotic, hope-filled way. We are the change that is going to change the “nobody talks about money” narrative.

So, let's talk about money!

If you are curious about working with me through Flourish, my financial therapy group, or in individual financial therapy, I am excited to meet with you to have a no-cost, no-pressure conversation.

If we met at the conference and you want to have a cocktail over zoom and just hang out I would delight in a good geek out about allll things financial therapy! If you have a crazy busy life and the time that you take to have the fun financial therapy conversations is at FTAC, cool, let’s meet up in Austin in 2026! The conference attendees weren’t wrong….. I am, indeed, Most Likely to Attend FTAC26….. the conference tickets are already bought….. flights will be purchased soon.

Thank You— Financial Therapy Association and all of those that attended the conference for taking the time to talk to me and allowing me space to be myself and get all nerdy about a topic I am soooo passionate about!

TIME CHANGE Flourish: A Women’s Financial Wellness Group — Starting June 2025

Tue, 03 Jun 2025 18:07:32 GMT

You Asked. We Listened.

We’re making a small shift to better fit your day — the morning group on Tuesdays will now meet at 9:00 a.m. MT instead of 11:00 a.m. MT!

Same supportive community, same powerful conversations — just a fresh, earlier start to your day.

Are you ready to take control of your financial journey, build confidence, and connect with a community of supportive women? I’m thrilled to announce that we will start 2 new groups of Flourish: A Women’s Financial Wellness Group, beginning this June!

Flourish is more than just a financial therapy group — it's a safe, empowering space designed to help women nurture a healthier, more confident relationship with money. Whether you are feeling overwhelmed by financial stress, looking to better understand your financial habits, or simply seeking a community where you can talk openly about money without judgment, Flourish is for you.

What to Expect:
��Supportive Community: Join a small group of women who understand the unique challenges and strengths we bring to our financial lives.
��Guided Financial Exploration: We'll gently explore your relationship with money — the emotions, beliefs, and experiences that shape your financial behavior today.
�� Tools for Growth: Learn strategies for managing money mindfully, setting meaningful financial goals, and building habits that support your overall wellbeing.
�� Healing & Empowerment: Through a mix of conversation, activities, and reflection, you’ll strengthen your confidence and cultivate a flourishing financial life.

Details:
��️ Start Date: June 17, 2025 OR June 25, 2025
�� Location: VIRTUAL
⏰ Sessions: Weekly meetings (for 6-weeks) @ 9:00 a.m. or 5:30 p.m. MT
�� Format: Combination of education, group discussion, and experiential exercises
�� Group Size: Limited spaces available to maintain intimacy and connection- 4-8 women per group

Why Join Flourish?
Women often carry unspoken pressures around money — from managing household finances to navigating career challenges, to preparing for future security. Flourish is here to break the silence, rewrite the narrative, and create a path toward financial peace and empowerment.

It’s time to stop just surviving and start flourishing — in your finances, and in your life.

Ready to Flourish?

Spots are limited.
Reserve your space or to learn more visit: CLICK HERE

The Dolly and the Legacy: What We Really Pass Down

Mon, 19 May 2025 18:28:58 GMT

Our Financial Anxieties, Thoughts, Feelings, and Behaviors.... Have you thought about them lately?

When I turned two years old, I received a gift that would stay with me far longer than anyone expected—a small, soft dolly. To my toddler self, she was everything: a companion for adventures, a comfort during storms, and an unassuming witness to my earliest experiences of the world. Over the years, she became worn around the edges—her fabric faded, her limbs a little floppier—but to me, she remained precious.

A couple of years ago, I did something I had imagined doing for a long time: I gave that same dolly to my daughter on her second birthday.

She immediately wrapped her tiny arms around it with the kind of effortless love only a child can give. In that moment, I felt a deep, almost indescribable emotion—part nostalgia, part joy, and part awareness that something far more important was being passed down than just a well-loved toy.

It made me pause and think: What do we really pass down to our children?

Yes, there are the obvious things—heirlooms, traditions, stories. But there’s also a quieter, more powerful inheritance that flows through our everyday actions: our values. Our mindset. Our habits. And perhaps most silently and pervasively—our relationship with money.

Growing up, I internalized so many financial habits without even realizing it. How we approached spending, saving, giving, and even talking about money was absorbed in the background of my childhood. Some of those patterns have served me well. Others I’ve had to examine more closely and choose to do differently.

And now, I’m more aware than ever that I am doing the same—teaching my children through example. Not through lectures or spreadsheets (at least, not yet), but through subtle, consistent moments. The way I talk about work. The way I handle stress around bills or big decisions. The way I model generosity, gratitude, and boundaries. They’re watching. They’re learning.

That dolly, as sentimental as she is, represents more than my past. She’s now part of our shared story—mine and my daughter’s. And she’s a physical reminder of what’s at stake when it comes to legacy.

We often think about generational wealth in terms of numbers, accounts, or assets. And yes, those matter. But wealth is also emotional. It’s behavioral. It’s inherited in the way a child feels about money, and themselves, for the rest of their life.

So now I try to ask myself regularly:

Am I modeling a healthy, balanced relationship with money?
Am I teaching the value of things—not just their cost?
Am I making space for conversations around money that are open, honest, and shame-free?

We won’t get it perfect—no one does. But we can be intentional.

We can decide which habits we want to pass down… and which ones we want to gently set aside, like old toys no longer needed.

The dolly may get a few more stitches and snuggles in the years to come. But the real gift is the awareness that we’re always passing something on. Let’s make sure it’s something worth keeping.

What are you passing down—intentionally or not—to the next generation?

Flourish: A Women’s Financial Wellness Group — Starting June 2025

Sun, 04 May 2025 18:00:03 GMT

Schedule a No-Cost Video Consultation to Join a Group TODAY!

Details:
��️ Start Date: June 17, 2025 OR June 25, 2025
�� Location: VIRTUAL
⏰ Sessions: Weekly meetings (for 6-weeks) @ 11:00 a.m. or 5:30 p.m. MT
�� Format: Combination of education, group discussion, and experiential exercises
�� Group Size: Limited spaces available to maintain intimacy and connection- 5-8 women per group

It’s time to stop just surviving and start flourishing — in your finances, and in your life.

Ready to Flourish?

Spots are limited.
Reserve your space or to learn more visit: CLICK HERE

Flourish: A Women's Financial Wellness Group

Fri, 21 Mar 2025 04:40:02 GMT

2 Great Groups to Join!
Beginning March 26, 2025 and April 1,2025.

What if money didn’t have to feel like a struggle?

Most people think that being in control of their dollars is just about cutting back or having more willpower—but that’s not how your brains work. The truth is, it isn’t about discipline. It’s about how our brains are working. When you understand how your brain responds to money, you can actually make managing money feel manageable and even enjoyable. When you can understand how your current behaviors are not only based on your current situations, but informed by all of the life you have already lived.

I’m leading a 6-week Women’s Financial Wellness Group where we will learn tools that are backed by science and proven to work in real life. No boring advice—just powerful, actionable strategies that will change how you think about your relationship with money. If you have any clients that you know may be interested in this group, please pass the information along!

Here’s a sneak peek at a few of the tools that we will cover:

✅ Reframe past money behavior and its impact on your future self: A simple mindset shift that makes past decisions make more sense, reducing shame.

✅ Learn about scarcity and abundance and its effects: Stop relying on willpower and use psychology to understand how our body responds to cues of deprivation.

✅ Learn how the nervous system plays a role in our behavior with money: A proven trick to curb impulse spending and keep more money in your pocket is knowing how you are feeling and caring for your emotional state before spending.

✅ Basic personal finance education: Understanding how money has evolved: Cash ➡️ Check ➡️Debit Card ➡️Credit Card ➡️ Etc. can help support why it has felt overwhelming to understand.

The best part? You don’t have to change everything at once. Just a few small tweaks can make a massive difference in your financial future.

Want to learn more about how YOU can take CONTROL and start building your confidence with money in a smart way? Want to have it stick this time?

Register for the Women’s Financial Wellness Group!!

Group #1 Starts on March 26, 2025 @ 7:00 P.M. MT

Group #2 Starts on April 1, 2025 @ 11:00 A.M. MT

Interested? Schedule a 15-minute no-cost consultation to see if this group is the right fit for you.

If you have questions or thoughts, feel free to reply to this email.

To your financial peacefulness,

Stacy Peterson, CFT, LCPC

Hey There, Mom. The best Gift you Could Give Yourself and Your Children is a Regulated Nervous System.

Sat, 01 Jun 2024 13:57:17 GMT

It's Saturday, you don’t have much going on, but you really want to get out of the house. So you load the kids up and head over to Target. You walk in and grab your favorite Starbucks drink and a few cake pops for the kids before settling into a small peruse around the “Dollar Spot” and though you went in for one specific thing for teacher week coming up next week you ended up getting a collection of gifts for your kids, cute décor that was on sale and those throw pillows you have been wanting for a while now. $150 later you leave. At home later you are feeling guilty that you really didn’t need some of the things, or angry that you gave in to the kid's requests. You suddenly remember the conversation you had with your spouse about how you both were going to be more mindful about how you spend. They aren’t home yet, so you contemplate taking some of the items back to the store to avoid a difficult conversation. Or maybe you will keep them and explain all of the ways that it is going to be OK.

We have all been there.

Let’s talk about what the emotions were before you went to the store. Boredom. You want to know what boredom is…. It's boring…. Lackluster…. Fun Sponge…. Killer of ALL the Dopamine in the brain. You want to know what finding a good deal is?! Fun….. exciting…. Engaging…. Activator of the dopamines!!

Now let's talk about the emotions happening after you left the store. Guity. Fearful. Angry. Your body is experiencing a shift in emotions and automatically is thinking about mobilizing itself to stop a potential threat i.e. an angry spouse. This is your nervous system activating to keep you safe from what is going to feel bad. Your body wants to keep you safe and help you stay away from what may hurt you or not feel good. HOWEVER, your nervous system can’t automatically weed through threats that are not real or “perceived.” It takes all threats as real and valid FIRST. And we NEED it to.

Imagine your body is like a big network of wires and switches that helps you feel, move, and think. Well, the nervous system is the boss of that network. It's like the control center of your body.

Here's how it works:

Sensory Input: It receives information from your senses (like touch, smell, taste, sight, and hearing) about what's happening in your environment and inside your body.
Processing: Your brain and spinal cord (which together form the central nervous system) process this information. They figure out what it means and decide how your body should respond.
Response: Once your brain and spinal cord figure out what to do, they send signals through your nerves to make your muscles move or to trigger other actions, like sweating or feeling pain.

If our nervous systems didn’t react automatically, then we would not pull away, run away, or sense danger and remove ourselves from danger. However, shopping or upset spouses are not typically real threats of danger that need to be protected from.

When our nervous system is dysregulated, it can lead to many different forms of chaos within our bodies and within our behavior. Just to name a few:

Emotional Dysregulation: When the nervous system is dysregulated, it can lead to difficulties in managing emotions. This may result in impulsive spending as a way to cope with or escape from negative emotions such as stress, anxiety, or depression. People may engage in retail therapy or compulsive buying to temporarily feel better, without considering the long-term consequences on their finances.
Reward Dysfunction: Dysregulation in the nervous system can affect the brain's reward circuitry, leading to altered responses to rewards and pleasures. This can manifest as seeking out the immediate gratification of making purchases, even if it means overspending or accumulating debt. The anticipation and act of buying may trigger dopamine release, providing a temporary boost in mood and reinforcing the spending behavior.
Impaired Decision-Making: Dysregulated nervous system functioning can impair cognitive processes such as decision-making and impulse control. Individuals may struggle to weigh the pros and cons of purchasing decisions, leading to impulsive and irrational spending choices. This can result in buying items they don't need or can't afford, contributing to financial instability.
Stress Response: Dysregulation of the nervous system can heighten the body's stress response, leading to increased levels of cortisol and adrenaline. Elevated stress hormones can influence spending behavior by triggering a 'fight or flight' response, where individuals may engage in excessive spending as a way to regain a sense of control or alleviate stress temporarily. However, this can ultimately exacerbate financial stress and lead to more negative consequences in the long run.

When we work together we rewrite the story. Imagine this:

It's Saturday, you don’t have much going on, but you really want to get out of the house. You remember that it's teacher week next week, so you plan what you would like to get your children’s teachers as a small token of thanks to all of their hard work this year. So you load the kids up and head over to Target. You walk in and grab your favorite Starbucks drink and a few cake pops for the kids. You walk through the “Dollar Spot” to get a cute cup to put the teacher’s gift in, and then grab a few of their favorite things in the store. You see some cute décor on sale and those throw pillows you have been wanting for a while now, you throw a quick text to your spouse to help you determine whether now is the best time to get these items, not to ask for permission, but rather get support in thinking about the purchase. Each time your children asked for something you were able to calmly respond with gentle conversations about what you are at the store for and remind them that they were lucky enough to get cake pops. $50 later you leave. You accomplished the goal of getting the teacher’s gifts and was able to get a few sale décor items. You were able to not get frazzled with every request from your children and give in to get them to quit whining and asking. At home later you are feeling proud of yourself because you stayed within the budget your household needs, you got out of the house, and were able to come home and relax.

There does not need to be shame around shopping and I can show you how. Together we can learn how to regulate your nervous system and walk away with confidence that you CAN be TRUSTED with money! You can be a great communicator with your spouse. Together we can REWIRE your brain.

Exploring Financial Therapy: What is it, and Why do I Need to Heal my Relationship with Money?

Wed, 29 May 2024 08:12:24 GMT

When I began working as a therapist in 2015 everything felt new and fresh, but everything was also scary and uncertain. I could feel that there was excitement in my clients who chose me to work with them and that they had hope that something inside of them could change in a meaningful way. As I have gotten more and more comfortable as a therapist, and dare I say more effective as a therapist, I can see that though people felt excited and ready for change many years ago, the depth of which I am able to work with clients is totally different. Do you know what the consistent trend is through all those years? Money is the last topic people will talk about, even if it is the biggest stressor in their life. They often carry a level of emotion, guilt, and fear attached to what would happen if people truly knew that part of their story. That somehow if they were to talk about it, all their worst fears would come to life, and they wouldn’t be able to manage the level of emotion that would come up if others knew…. I mean if they really knew.

So, in early 2023, after having many clients coming to the point of them sharing their real truths and feeling completely paralyzed by money or some facet of it, I began reaching out to all the financial people I knew to point me in the right direction to getting the tools my clients need. In the Fall of 2023, I FINALLY found Financial Therapy. It was as if I knew the knowledge that I needed to get and for once be able to provide my clients with something more than empathy. They needed hard tools. Clear direction. They wanted something more.

I am deeply passionate about all that financial therapy has to teach us and I really think you should be too!

Let's embark on a journey to uncover what financial therapy is all about and how it can profoundly impact your relationship with money.

Understanding Financial Therapy

Financial therapy combines elements of financial planning and psychological counseling to help humans understand and improve their financial behaviors, attitudes, and beliefs. It recognizes that money is not merely a practical tool but also a deeply emotional and symbolic aspect of our lives.

I am able to work with women to weed through all of the information that they have had in their brains that tell them that they should “just take the emotion out of it,” and do something better. The fact of the matter is, we are all human and respond in human ways. Our decisions, no matter how big or small, are decided upon emotions. When a person is going to put an offer in on a house, sometimes what is needed is a “love letter” to the seller to set you apart from the other offers on the property. Why do people do this? To pull at the heart strings of the seller to let them know that you are serious. To evoke emotion. To have them make an emotional decision to pick them. Emotional.

Women are historically regarded as people that shouldn’t be free to do with money as they will because they are ….. “frivolous,” “careless,” “spontaneous,” “reckless”…. Etc. To the fact that when I went to find some great memes to include in a presentation I found HUNDREDS of memes mocking women for their choices with money, how men need to hold tight to their money (because of women), and undertones of societies inability to trust women with money. What started out as a way for me to incorporate some humor, quickly became a fueling of my anger towards the reasons I have seen women suppress their financial stresses for YEARS! Seriously, I just wanted a good laugh, I wanted to see memes where women were bada**es shouting from the rooftops that they are overcoming and laughing at the ridiculous notion that just because we have vaginas and emotions that we can’t be trusted with money.

Just as with any therapy, the goal is to foster a healthier relationship with money, alleviate financial stress, and promote overall well-being. This is only going to be possible if we work together to change the culture around what we as women believe is possible.

The Roots of Financial Therapy

The roots of financial therapy can be traced back to various disciplines, including financial planning, psychology, counseling, and marriage and family therapy. It emerged from the realization that traditional financial advice often fails to address the underlying emotional issues that drive financial behaviors.

In the therapeutic world it is a revolving joke that people are more willing to talk about their sex lives way before their money lives. This has proven to be so true in so many different instances. Sex therapy was coined in the late 1960s where financial therapy was not officially named until 2008. For 40 years people were going to therapists willing to talk about their sexual dysfunction but were not talking about finances. Nor did the therapists probably have the skills to help them navigate all of the chaos that finances were becoming. The first credit card came on the scene in the 1950s. The nationwide household debt has continued to be in a sharp upward turn ever since. The 2008 housing crisis made everything really real and people didn’t have a choice but to talk about it. In the post COVID world we see even different changes that have greatly impacted how people interact with money. By integrating psychological insights into financial planning, financial therapy offers a holistic approach to money management. I don’t want the fear of talking about it to hold people back from living their best lives. I want to be a safe place where you can come, be heard and get the support that you have been wishing was available.

How Financial Therapy Works

We talk about money without REALLY talking about money first. We believe that one’s relationship with money is deeply intertwined with emotional well-being. We approach financial therapy with empathy, and compassion in a holistic approach that integrates mental health first and financial well-being second. We know too much at this point about how our nervous system responds when it is activated and needing to respond in fight, flight, freeze or fawning behaviors to know that the traditional financial literacy just isn’t enough to truly make lasting change in our human bodies. We truly need to address how your body responds when it thinks about money before we are able to address the big goals you have for yourself financially.

Financial therapy sessions typically involve discussions about money-related beliefs, attitudes, and behaviors. We use a variety of techniques, such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, mindfulness practices, parts work, and narrative therapy, to help clients explore their relationship with money and identify areas for improvement.

Some common topics addressed in financial therapy include:

Money Mindset: Examining deep-seated beliefs and attitudes about money inherited from upbringing, culture, or past experiences.
Financial Communication: Improving communication about money within couples or families to reduce conflicts and build mutual understanding.
Financial Goal Setting: Helping clients clarify their financial goals and develop strategies to achieve them.
Financial Anxiety and Stress: Addressing feelings of anxiety, guilt, or shame related to money and finding healthy coping mechanisms.
Spending and Saving Patterns: Identifying patterns of overspending, undersaving, or other unhealthy financial behaviors and exploring their underlying causes.
Life Transitions: Navigating major life events such as marriage, divorce, career changes, or retirement and understanding their financial implications.

Who Can Benefit from Financial Therapy?

Financial therapy is not just for those experiencing financial crises; it can benefit anyone seeking to improve their relationship with money. Whether you're struggling with debt, navigating a career change, planning for retirement, or simply want to feel more empowered about your finances, financial therapy can provide valuable insights and support.

I specialize in working with women specifically. I believe that there is so much work that we can do together to change the way in which we interact with money to change the way the future women in our world approach their money lives whether at home or work. I often get asked if married women can do financial therapy without their spouses and the answer is ABSOLUTELY!! In fact, I encourage it. Many of the financial advisors I have known talk to me about the women they come across when their spouses pass and the women are fearful of handling the finances on their own. This is something that I can help you with! Let’s look that fear in the face and take its power away!

The Benefits of Financial Therapy

The benefits of financial therapy extend far beyond just improving your financial situation. By addressing the emotional and psychological aspects of money, it can lead to:

Reduced stress and anxiety related to finances
Improved communication and teamwork within couples or families
Greater clarity and confidence in financial decision-making
Enhanced overall well-being and life satisfaction

Finding a Financial Therapist. Am I a Good Fit?

In a world where money plays such a significant role in our lives, it's essential to cultivate a healthy relationship with it. Financial therapy offers a valuable pathway to understanding and addressing the emotional underpinnings of our financial behaviors. Whether you're facing financial challenges or simply want to feel more empowered about your money, exploring the realm of financial therapy could be a transformative journey towards financial well-being and peace of mind.

However, finding the right financial therapist is crucial for a successful experience. I am not going to be the best fit for everyone, and it’s important that you and I both know that. If you aren’t sure, don’t hesitate to schedule a consultation with me! It's also essential to find someone you feel comfortable opening up to and who understands your unique financial situation and goals. I am excited to get to know you and your journey with money.